Gwen

 I figure it's better if I write these down, then when I get stuck again I can go back through my archives and pick the one that fits... oh, yeah, gotta learn That lesson again. (Read more)

 This is the kind of morning where I feel like hitting my head against the wall, because nothing else seems to be working. (Read more)

I've gone from dithering to floundering... is that a step forward or back? 

My kids are driving my crazy... I'm seeing more of the principal's office now than I ever did as a kid. I'm ready to string up a 5th grader and a 10th grader, both for being morons. Another 4-day weekend with the kids starts tomorrow, and I didn't get any recovery time last weekend because I spent the whole weekend running hither and yon. So I spent most of Monday sleeping. On top of my kids, I'm now running a neighbor kid to school in the morning because dad sold mom's car out from under her and hasn't found her a new one. And I'm watching one of my 5th-grader's friends before and after school. Which both pay, but only minimally because I know how much money they don't make (not the place for a 'raise the minimum wage' rant).

The change of the secondary doesn't change the last 1/4 of the book like I feared... it explains what's already there. Which means I have to do it! Well damn! I had other plans for the next month. Damn!

Still working on the proposal re-work. Last night I read the 2nd and 3rd chapters and cringed... I let this go out??? Yikes! There are four scenes where characters do nothing but blather at each other... I knew better, even then!

But, maybe I've learned to spot it more readily or something. I'm really trying to give myself credit for having learned a bunch in the last year, rather than giving myself hassles for how bad it was... I'm not there, but I'm trying. :-)

I spent Tuesday attempting to get down on paper all the things that needed to get said in the first page and a half... the hook... of the proposal that got lost in the mail. Then I spent yesterday re-writing. Yesterday evening I took the brand new first scene and the slightly edited second scene into my RWA chapter's critique session, and got rave reviews. The two gals who had read it before said it was vastly improved, and the two gals who hadn't seen it before had only some minor wording thoughts... in other words, the first scene is now good to go. Yah!!

And... I trimmed 872 words off the first chapter... which is only a dent in the 30k+ that need to go, but it's a start.

Kids are still home, haven't gotten a word written since Thursday.

Then yesterday it hit me that the buying editor, at the publishing house I desperately what to sell my completed manuscript to, has said she'll keep an eye out for my revised submission and read it when it comes, because she's sorry it took so long for me to find out it never made it. Aaarrrrggghhh!!! I don't know how to fix it!!! And now I'm in a tizzy... what I do here, with this first sentence, first paragraph, could mean the difference between selling this thing and not. This is the house I aimed it at from the very first word I wrote 5 years ago. Aaarrrgghhh!!

Only 1800 words today and a little editing, and I'm trying to give myself credit for that instead of being disappointed I didn't match yesterday's numbers, especially since it was a busy (out and about) day.